Like many millions of people across the world, ten years ago I stood before a television screen watching 'live' pictures from New York.
Like most people, I could hardly believe what I watching.
The images are now, of course, infamous. The appalling pictures of a burning tower, the shocking sight of a (second) plane hitting the South Tower of the World Trade Centre, the awful realisation of what was happening in terms of loss of life and devastation when that same tower tumbled to the ground, followed shortly by it's twin.
On that day I was in a small television control room - at the time I was running a small local television station in Hertfordshire (England). This was quite an experiment - a small 'free to air' terrestrial station accessible to the people of Hertford and Ware who benefitted from a transmission arrangement with SKY TV who's news feed we took for two hours several times a day. We had just 'opted' over to SKY feed (2pm London time, 9am NY time) when the first images of the burning North Tower appeared. A group of us on station at the time including some very young reporters and broadcasters, stood and watched - listening to the commentators, asking the same questions. First - 'is this is a movie?' Then - 'Could this be an accident?' 'How could a plane crash into the tower?'
We stood and witnessed that second aircraft hit the second tower. There was then no doubt. It was at this point that I think I said it out loud 'Terrorist attack!' It could be nothing else.
The day unfolded - we stayed with the Sky News pictures but we still had work to do, schedules to draw up, meetings to attend, local reaction to the Twin Towers disaster to pick up as appropriate. That was our job as news reporters and broadcasters.
But I don't remember much of that day really apart from watching the South, and then the North Tower fall, realising just how many people were dying...right there....right before the eyes of the world. The affect on the young members of my team, my responsibility, as the enormity of what was unfolding so many thousands of miles away in New York dawned on us all. Even for someone who had worked in the media, in the news, for so long and had seen and observed a good deal, this was a shocking day. I don't mind admitting I cried, silently, with the shock and sadness and horror of it all. And I went home at the end of a long day and watched TV into the small hours and then listened on the radio, sleeping little, filled ( I remember) with an overwhelming sense of loss.
While I did not lose anyone on a personal level, I remembered a similarly bright and sunny early September day in 1980 when I sat on the Plaza between the Twin Towers, eating a sandwich and listening to a band playing 'New York! New York!' as the busy city bustled around me. My first summer in the United States and my second visit to NY. It seemed an extraordinary place. It was an extraordinary place. Hopeful, vibrant, stimulating, a little scary for a young British student, but extraordinarily exciting.
After that day in 2001 much more was to follow, as we know. The media told us the poignant stories of those killed and those left behind. As the world responded, as politicians made decisions which has led to a decade of ongoing conflict in the 'war on terror', as the media reported and picked apart every aspect of the Day that Changed History, that sense of sadness has remained.
The images are still shocking and with this year's tenth anniversary of those events comes another swathe of painful reminders, harrowing stories of the lost and their families. The media reporting, once again, every minute detail of the day, from every concievable angle. It is their job.
But I don't ever want to forget the feeling I had that day- Tuesday September 11th 2001 - the overwhelming sadness as I watched the Twin Towers burn and then crumble to the ground. The knowledge that people were passing away and we were all witnesses.
In recent days I've heard a couple of bereaved family members explain how difficult it is to live with the pictures, all around them, resigned to always having to relive the last precious moments of their loved ones lives as the pictures run endlessly on the news and in documentaries and movies. But knowing that will always be the case. Their anguish and loss is part of history.
Some will remember quietly today, out of the media spotlight, while in New York and Washington DC and Pennsylvania and across the world, others will gather in public to remember. Many people from many nations lost their lives that day and while the focus is on the United States, and on New York, the sense of loss extends much further.
But then there's the sense of hope coming out of tragedy, and a celebration of the courage displayed on that day - from members of the emergency services and ordinary men and women - which continues even a decade on.
One unnamed New Yorker stopped in the street this week by a tv film crew, summed it up: 'We're New Yorkers, we're strong, we'll survive'. Another commented: 'The sky was darkened that day but as time moves on, year on year, the cloud is lifting and the sky is blue again'. And we heard the brave words of survivors and those left behind who have built something positive out of something so awful. The people who are running support groups and memorials for loved ones lost, insistent that good must come of this terrible evil, determined that hope for the future will be the legacy of that awful day. The new Memorial Gardens in the footprint of the Twin Towers at what became known as 'Ground Zero' a testament to what another New Yorker was heard to say as he looked expectantly and optimistically toward the future : 'We prove these people did not die in vain'.
Of course, it's important to remember what has unfolded since that day - more conflict across the world, more death, more terror in other cities including London. And the media and others will naturally use this significant anniversary to comment on that fact, to question and qualify.
But today let's stop a moment, to just remember, to pray for those who lost loved ones ten years ago and for those still struggling with the injuries and trauma suffered and those still living daily with their memories of the day. Let's thank God for courage in the face of devastating loss. Let's pray for peace, and hope, and optimism.
Archbishop Desmond Tutu, in 'An African Prayer Book' (Hodder & Stoughton 1995) penned these lines, written years before 9/11 but so appropriate to this day:
Goodness is stronger than evil;
Love is stronger than hate;
Light is stronger than darkness;
Life is stronger than death;
Victory is ours through Him who loves us.
Original Articles. Constant-Content.
